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What’s It All About?

keep identity for self


It Is Never About You


What is human conversation about?

  • It is never ever about you!

Why is it never about you?

  • Because it is always only about roles.
  • It is always about who is what role.
  • You are not roles. You are not behaviors.
  • You are a being, not a doing.

So let it go!

  • Confess quickly and stay out of conflict!
  • Make it about your behaviors and not your being and it is no big deal—making you free to confess any fault or to be agreeable.

Another Reason It’s Not About You

  • It is never about you because no one knows you.

Since you do not even know yourself, then how can anyone else!?

  • If no one knows you then how can anything anyone says be about you!?

So never own it!


Quotations from Various Sources

Organized Alphabetically

“Agree with thine adversary quickly, whiles thou art in the way with him; lest at any time the adversary deliver thee to the judge, and the judge deliver thee to the officer, and thou be cast into prison. Verily I say unto thee, Thou shalt by no means come out thence, until thou hast paid the uttermost farthing.” —Matthew 5:25-26 

“Among my most prized possessions are words that I have never spoken.” —Orson Card 

“Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving us worthy evidence of the fact.” —George Eliot 

“But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation;” —I Peter 1:15 

“Don’t speak unless you can improve on the silence.” —Spanish proverb 

“Draw me not away with the wicked, and with the workers of iniquity, which speak peace to their neighbours, but mischief is in their hearts.” —Psalms 28:3 

“Foolishness always results when the tongue outraces the brain.” —Unknown 

“For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself.” —Galatians 6:3 

“It is better to keep one’s mouth shut and be thought a fool than to open it and resolve all doubt.” —Abraham Lincoln 

“Man’s goings are of the Lord: how can a man then understand his own way?” —Proverbs 20:24 

“Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.” —Proverbs 16:24 

“Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute.” —Josh Billings 

“Some man holdeth his tongue, because he hath not to answer: and some keepeth silence, knowing his time.” —Ecclesiasticus 20:6 

“The first duty of love is to listen.” —Paul Tillich, 1886-1965 

“The most precious things in speech are pauses.” —Ralph Richardson 

“There are very few people who don’t become more interesting when they stop talking.” —Mary Lowry 

“Treat a man as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he could be, and he will become what he should be.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson 



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