• People say change is painful, but what people find painful about change is exchanging claims for knowing for not knowing.
• When adults are talking about emotional or psychological pain, it’s a safe bet that they are talking about affronts to their ego a.k.a. self-esteem.
• When someone says, “You hurt me when you said that,” you can translate that to mean, “I identified with the ugly concept or image that you shared.”
• People will say things like, “I can’t stand that,” or “That was horrible,” which typically translates into, “That makes or made me look defective, stupid, unwanted, or worthless.”
• People will say things like, “That must have been painful to hear,” and if you read in-between the lines, then their message is that, that made you look defective, stupid, unwanted, or worthless.