Communication Collection from 3D: Daily Dose of Discernment
- Attitude Is All You Need! Second Edition will help you to improve your attitude, which improves everything else.
“The great rivers flow quietly; a wise man doesn’t raise his voice.” —Chinese proverb
- Read and discover the best diagrams and maps of how people control and manipulate you.
Note on the Communication Collection
- This collection was started on August 27, 2020.
- Only some of the daily quotations on communication have found their way here.
- This is not meant to be a complete collection.
3D: Daily Dose of Discernment: 2017
#Double #Trouble: 2017-12-14
• Who thinks like this, “Leave me alone but don’t ignore me.”
• Who thinks like this, “Give me space but keep me in your space.”
• Who thinks like this, “Don’t talk to me but don’t stop thinking about me.”
• Who thinks like this, “I am going to ignore you, but you better not ignore me.”
• Who thinks like this, “I have nothing to say to you, but you better know what I would have said.”
3D: Daily Dose of Discernment: 2018
#Change #Painful: 2018-03-07
• People say change is painful, but what people find painful about change is exchanging claims for knowing for not knowing.
• When adults are talking about emotional or psychological pain, it’s a safe bet that they are talking about affronts to their ego a.k.a. self-esteem.
• When someone says, “You hurt me when you said that,” you can translate that to mean, “I identified with the ugly concept or image that you shared.”
• People will say things like, “I can’t stand that,” or “That was horrible,” which typically translates into, “That makes or made me look defective, stupid, unwanted, or worthless.”
• People will say things like, “That must have been painful to hear,” and if you read in-between the lines, then their message is that, that made you look defective, stupid, unwanted, or worthless.
#Cannot #Done: 2018-06-13
• People who say that something cannot be done inspire brave souls to do it anyway.
• People who say that something cannot be done block themselves but not farsighted pioneers.
• People who say that something cannot be done should not interfere with people learning to do it.
• People who say that something cannot be done should not try to stop people experimenting with solutions.
• People who say that something cannot be done should not attempt to stop people from testing new approaches, ideas, methods, and solutions.
3D: Daily Dose of Discernment: 2020
#Foolish #Thinking: 2020-05-04
1. A fool is someone who thinks their biases are accurate perspectives.
2. A fool is someone who thinks insults constitute arguments and reasons.
3. A fool is someone who thinks their interpretations are what they interpret.
4. A fool is someone who thinks a collection of facts constitutes a set of arguments and reasoning.
5. A fool is someone who thinks that they are safe to say and think what they like without analysis, examination, or testing as long as it is culturally or politically correct.
#Partners #Cheat: 2020-07-31
Partners cheat on each other for one or more of five primary reasons.
1. To get their partner’s attention and concern back.
2. To punish their partner for not making them happy.
3. To seek ego pleasure from being admired and desired by another.
4. To seek companionship and sexual expression that is denied or limited at home.
5. They are immoral, unprincipled, and hedonistic; therefore, they seek their own pleasure anywhere they can.
#Self-Inflicted #Injury: 2020-08-10
1. Injurious words do not exist because words have no magical powers to cause harm.
2. Injurious thoughts do not exist because thoughts have no claws or teeth with which to harm anyone.
3. Injured selves do not exist because no person can enter into another person in order to harm them.
4. What exists is self-inflicted pain by ego (negative self-concepts and self-images are owned).
5. What exists is imaginary injuries to imaginary selves (Frankenstein monsters composed of self-concepts and self-images).
#Messenger #Message: 2020-08-17
1. You are the agent, not the delivery.
2. You are the courier, not the package.
3. You are the messenger, not the message.
4. You are the emissary, not the information.
5. You are the ambassador, not the greeting.
#Idea #Not: 2020-08-18
1. The idea about the idea is not the idea.
2. The explanation of the idea is not the idea.
3. The discussion about the idea is not the idea.
4. The comparison of the idea with other ideas is not the idea.
5. The college course, lecture, and textbook on the idea is not the idea.
#Feel #Bad: 2020-08-19
1. How is making me feel bad for doing wrong accomplishing anything but your pride in being right?
2. How is making me feel bad for doing wrong accomplishing anything but making it all about my ego?
3. How is making me feel bad for doing wrong accomplishing anything but making coping not an option?
4. How is making me feel bad for doing wrong accomplishing anything but distracting me from problem-solving?
5. How is making me feel bad for doing wrong accomplishing anything but encouraging destructive feelings like discouragement and depression?
#Fake #News: 2020-08-22
The news is not objective because—
1. The news selects some political positions for focus while ignoring and minimizing other political positions.
2. The news selects evidence that favors one political position and ignores and minimizes evidence that supports other political positions.
3. The news selects stories that promote one political position while neglecting more important stories that promote contrary or different political views.
4. The news selects historical events that favor one political position while ignoring and minimizing historical events that favor other political positions.
5. The news selects accomplishments and results that prefer one political position while ignoring and minimizing accomplishments, achievements, and results that favor different political positions.
#Debate #Ideas: 2020-08-27
1. Debate the speech, not the speaker.
2. Debate what is in the writing, not the writer.
3. Debate a person’s ideas, not who that person is or was.
4. Debate what was said, not the character of the person who said it.
5. Discussions on the Internet often go nowhere because people talk to claim pride-in-knowing in their own eyes, not to learn, understand, or help others.
#Thinking #Insult: 2020-08-28
1. Was the thinking of the person who insulted you such that it hurt them morally and spiritually?
2. Was the thinking of the person who insulted you such that it is destroying their honesty and integrity?
3. Was the thinking of the person who insulted you a pathetic and primitive form that you reject for yourself?
4. Understand the expression, “Consider the source,” as being about the foolish thinking that drives a person to lower and degrade themselves into insults and name-calling.
5. Feel sorry for the person who has poisonous thinking, and don’t drink their poison with them.
Related Pages with Free Help fo Communication
- Communication Skills: Free Help
- For Difficult People: Difficult People: How to Handle
- For Double-Binds: Double-Binds: How to Respond to Them
- Free Reminder Card to Print: 2 Healthy Options: Problem-solving & Coping
- More on Whining: Damning, Whining, & Blaming
- Styles of Communicating: 25 Relational Styles.
- The 5 sides to Every Story: 5 Thinking Positions
- Read for diagrams and maps of how people use and abuse you.