7 Steps to Suppression: Based on No-ting
- Stress for Success, Second Edition for $3.99 will teach you how to make stress work for you.
“Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be.” —Thomas à Kempis
“Suppression is destructive while self-restraint is productive.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
7 Steps to Suppression with Explanations
7 Steps of Suppression
- It should not exist.
- I cannot fix it.
- It makes me a failure.
- I cannot stand it.
- It cannot exist.
- I must suppress it.
- I cover it with thoughts.
7 Steps of Suppression with Short Explanations
- It should not exist. I interpret, judge, and damn it.
- I cannot fix it. I experience failure trying to change and control it.
- It makes me a failure. It causes me to look bad, to have low self-esteem.
- I cannot stand it. I hate and resent it for making me look bad, foolish, and powerless.
- It cannot exist. It is making me a failure, so it must die. Therefore, I react and respond to it with aggression and rage.
- I must suppress it. The only solution left is to deny it. I must cover it, so I don’t see or hear it.
- I cover it with thoughts. I hide it behind ideas about it and thoughts of darkness.
7 Steps of Suppression with Longer Explanations
1. It should not exist. Some external or internal event is interpreted as annoying, inconvenient, or somehow problematic. It might be an experience, sound, or thought. For example, a loud construction or traffic noise near where you are living or working might be what you want to suppress.
- It can also be something larger like a competing political party or beliefs being expressed that are contrary to those of the current political power. The same steps work both internally and externally.
2. I cannot fix it. Trying to change or control the problem repeatedly fails. You have no or little acceptance of the existence of the problem. Despite your best efforts and trying to get the aid of others in solving or ending the problem, the problem still persists.
3. It makes me a failure. You personalize your failure to change, control, or fix the problem. Since you failed, then you are a failure. This is the logic of ego and self-esteem.
- The major ways to put yourself down are by thinking that you are stupid, worthless, an outcast, or somehow broken or defective. All of these are used as excuses to suppress.
4. I cannot stand it. Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) calls this Low Frustration Tolerance (LFT). It is a symptom that you are experiencing ego pain, low self-esteem, or mental and emotional disturbance.
- You hate the ego pain of appearing foolish to yourself and others.
5. It cannot exist. It will not go away. It will not be ignored. Therefore, it must end for the sake of my peace of mind.
- This is the conclusion that results from having ego pain and not knowing how to end the ego pain. The projected cause of the ego pain must cease so that the ego pain can cease.
6. I must suppress it. This is the decision to get rid of the perceived cause of your problem. The actual cause of your problem is typically your emotional immaturity and your slavery to self-esteem.
- Learn emotional responsibility and lessen your ego until you don’t feel the need to suppress much.
7. I cover it with thoughts. I will cover it with thoughts about it, such as how petty, stupid, or wrong it is. Or, I will cover it with thoughts of darkness so that I no longer see or hear it.
- Covering it for yourself does not cover it for others.
- Mental chatter or self-talk is often just a mechanism for covering, for the act of keeping something suppressed.
Notes on Suppression
- Suppression is a calculated response to control failure.
- Suppression is a secondary problem. Suppression comes from having discomfort about your discomfort or a problem with your problem.
- Suppression doubles your trouble.
- Suppression is a form of no-ting, of trying to make something that exists not to exist.
- Suppression becomes more common as you get older.
- Suppression is externalized and can easily be seen in the world when practiced by governments, political parties, and social movements.
- No-ting is perhaps the single greatest cause of human distress and emotional suffering.
- No-ting is explored in the book Not, which is also known as Don’t Read This!
- When others remind us of what we suppress, then we attack them and suppress them to punish them into silence.
- What you cannot stand becomes your stressor.
- No-ting is the stress creator because trying to make something not exist that exists will result in negative stress. Remember, positive stress causes progress and negative stress either causes a lack of progress or a standstill.
- What you cannot change, control, or fix is, in fact, everything. Only God has the authority and power to change anything in any way.
- Denial and suppression don’t work, so continue to cycle stress until there is enough stress to demand release, which will mean a new or larger form of denial and suppression.
Motivation, Payoffs, & Desire for Suppression
Suppression requires one to think that they know better than what exists. Such pride is the lifeblood of the ego. Note how every step of the 7 Steps of Suppression is a claim to know. Remember claiming to know is for ego, not self.
- How could the ego not take delight in the act of suppression?
- Why wouldn’t ego (desire for ego pleasure) create issues that you would respond to with suppression?
- Admitting that you want to have issues that will require suppression will be an affront to your ego. Why?
- Consider that suppression serves the ego and look for the payoffs for your ego for engaging in suppression.
#No-ting #Resistance: 2019-11-30
For more on no-ting, read the book “Not” a.k.a. “Don’t Read This!”
1. No-ting (should-not-be) is trying to change and control things, and trying is failing because trying is focused on failing.
2. No-ting (should-not-be) leads to psychological resistance to change because no-ting makes change impossible.
3. No-ting (should-not-be) leads to doing the opposite of what you want to do because no-ting focuses you on the opposite.
4. No-ting (should-not-be) leads to suppression and repression because of the frustration caused by the continued failures of no-ting.
5. No-ting (should-not-be) leads to destructive guilt and shame because of the repeated failures of no-ting lead to suspicions about your role in the repeated failures to do the right thing.