logo Kevin's website key image

Blame or Responsibility?

you are what you hate


100 Things to Blame Instead of Owning Your Life

“It is the peculiar quality of a fool to perceive the faults of others and to forget his own.” —Cicero

“He therefore that despiseth, despiseth not man, but God, who hath also given unto us His holy Spirit.” —I Thessalonians 4:8

“The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.” —Albert Ellis


You can blame any one of or all of the following 100 reasons for your problems:

  1. abuse
  2. addiction
  3. additives
  4. adopted
  5. advantages
  6. air quality
  7. alcohol
  8. angels
  9. asbestos insulation
  10. bacteria
  11. balance
  12. biohazards
  13. biology
  14. birth experience
  15. birth order
  16. chemical imbalance
  17. childhood
  18. class
  19. computers
  20. conditioning
  21. culture
  22. depleted soils
  23. devils
  24. diet
  25. disease
  26. drugs
  27. economy
  28. education
  29. environment
  30. ethnic group
  31. exercise
  32. experience
  33. family
  34. fertilizers
  35. flow of chi
  36. food
  37. foster-care experiences
  38. fungus
  39. genes
  40. God
  41. greed
  42. harmony
  43. hereditary
  44. heritage
  45. hormones
  46. human nature
  47. illness
  48. influences
  49. lack of …
  50. lack of love
  51. lead paint
  52. lead pipes
  53. maya (illusion)
  54. media
  55. men
  56. microbes
  57. moon: Eastern astrology
  58. neurology
  59. neighborhood
  60. opportunity
  61. parenting
  62. parents
  63. peers
  64. pesticides
  65. poisoned water
  66. poisoned air
  67. pollution
  68. posture
  69. power plants
  70. prejudice
  71. processed foods
  72. programming
  73. psychology
  74. race
  75. racism
  76. radon poisoning
  77. radiation
  78. relationships
  79. religious leaders
  80. religious training
  81. scripts
  82. sex
  83. single-parent home
  84. sociology
  85. spinal alignment
  86. spirits
  87. spiritual
  88. stress
  89. sun: Western astrology
  90. support system
  91. suppression
  92. teachers
  93. toxins
  94. trauma
  95. viruses
  96. vitamins
  97. water quality
  98. women
  99. work
  100. work environment

BLAME OR RESPONSIBILITY & LIFE OWNERSHIP

  • Or you can take responsibility for your own mind, thinking, feeling, behaving, AND attitude.

Which do you think will help you the most?

  1. To blame other causes, such as those in the list above.
  2. To blame your own thinking and to change it without blaming or damning your being;.
  3. To blame your choices but not your being.

Book cover for "Garden Your Mind"


Quotations from Various Sources

Organized Alphabetically

“A baby expects to be soothed, but a mature adult soothes themselves.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice 

“A man’s as miserable as he thinks he is.” —Marcus Seneca 

“Adults are expert at self-disturbance and inept at self-soothing.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice 

“And just as two wrongs don’t make a right, rage against offenders is probably the worst way to try to correct them.” —Albert Ellis and Robert A. Harper, A Guide to Rational Living, Third Edition, p. 130 

“Are you part of the problem or part of the solution?” —Anonymous 

“As long as the mind is in conflict–blaming, resisting, condemning–there can be no understanding. If I want to understand you, I must not condemn you, obviously.” —J. Krishnamurti, The Collected Works of J. Krishnamurti, Volume V, p. 51 

“Being right does not give you the right to damn.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice 

“But let every man prove his own work, and then shall he have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another.” —Galatians 6:4 

“Damning is the worst form of demanding.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice 

“Do not weep; do not wax indignant. Understand.” —Baruch Spinoza 

“Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.” —Mark Twain 

“Either do not attempt at all, or go through with it.” —Ovid 

“Even when people act nastily to you, don’t condemn them or retaliate.” —Albert Ellis and Robert A. Harper, A Guide to Rational Living, Third Edition, p. 205 

“Give not over thy mind to heaviness, and afflict not thyself in thine own counsel.” —Ecclesiasticus 30:21 

“Great works are performed not by strength, but by perseverance.” —Samuel Johnson 

“He therefore that despiseth, despiseth not man, but God, who hath also given unto us His holy Spirit.” —I Thessalonians 4:8 

“I have yet to find the man, however exalted his station, who did not do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than under a spirit of criticism.” —Charles M. Schwab 

“I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him.” —Booker Taliaferro Washington, 1856-1915 

“If pleasure first, then pain second.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice 

“If we have not peace within ourselves, it is in vain to seek it from outward sources.” —Francois de La Rochefoucauld 

“If you would stop, really stop, damning yourself, others, and unkind conditions, you would find it almost impossible to upset yourself emotionally–about anything. Yes, anything.” —Albert Ellis and Robert A. Harper, A Guide to Rational Living, Third Edition, p. 127 

“It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.” —Agnes Repplier 

“Let us not burden our remembrances with a heaviness that is gone.” —William Shakespeare 

“Man is condemned to be free; because once thrown into the world, he is responsible for everything he does.” —Jean-Paul Sartre, 1905-1980 

“No one has ever gotten to anyone.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice 

“Only God can damn without serving Satan.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice 

“Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.” —Anonymous 

“Take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame.” —Erica Jong 

“Teaching the principle of emotional responsibility can be one of the hardest tasks in REBT as clients may have habitually blamed others for their problems and now the therapist is pointing to the true source of their emotional problems–themselves.” —Michael Neenan and Windy Dryden, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy: Advances in Theory and Practice, p. 43 

“The moment you blame anyone for anything, your relationship and your personal power deteriorate.” —Brian Koslow 

“The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” —Joan Didion 

“There is no man so low that the cure for his condition does not lie strictly within himself.” —Thomas L. Masson 

“We can actually put the essence of neurosis in a single word: blaming–or damning.” —Albert Ellis and Robert A. Harper, A Guide to Rational Living, Third Edition, p. 127 

“When you blame others, you give up your power to change.” —Anonymous 

“You are what you hate not what you ate.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice 

“You can overcome anything if you don’t bellyache.” —Bernard Baruch

MENU

kevinfitzmaurice.com